Disclaimer: This is definitely, in detail, the full story. AKA Pretty long since it's a big life event I want to remember! So feel free to scroll down just for pictures, or if you are looking for a random read, enjoy the whole thing! :)
Preface
Let's start with a few weeks before my due date. I think I was 36 weeks and they told me I was dilated to a 1! I was so excited thinking I was well on my way to progressing and that I'd go into labor soon, or at least by my due date!
For the next few weeks I stayed dilated at a 1 and had no other signs of progression with labor.
My mom and little brother came to town on Sunday, July 12th. I was due the following Wednesday, July 15th (my birthday!). My mom's job is extremely busy in the summer, and my little sister Lydia was getting married on July 31st and there was still lots to do for the wedding, so my mom and brother planned to be in town for just a week, until Sunday, July 19th. We spent the first few days they were in town going out to eat (spicy foods!), swimming, taking a few laps around our complex, and any other (normal--NOT castor oil!) thing we could to help with labor. My doctor told me that statistically I'd probably give birth a few days before or after my due date as that's when majority of women typically deliver especially since our baby always looked to be on track.
My birthday/due date came and we were all hoping for a special birthday present for me! I had an appointment that day scheduled in case I hadn't gone into labor yet. At the appointment we had an ultrasound and then a visit with one of the nurse practitioners. We were so happy to have the ultrasound done by our favorite ultrasound technician who had done all but one or two of our ultrasounds. She was always so thorough and explained everything we were seeing so that we could follow along. You could tell she loves what she does, and she was always so sweet and told us how beautiful our baby was :). Throughout the ultrasound, though Hazel was squished in there, we saw a few indicators that our girl was a little on the chubby side, but we figured she'd come out an average 7-pounder because that's what they had predicted a few weeks prior. You could see her chubby cheeks and some little fat rolls because of the way she was sitting! It was so cute.
Later we met with the nurse practitioner. She got straight to the point when she walked in and said "you guys have a big baby!" She said our girl was estimated at that time to be about 9lb 2oz! We were totally surprised since they had never thought her to be big throughout my pregnancy. The nurse practitioner checked me and I was still at a 1. She wanted me to be mentally prepared and know that delivering via c-section was a possibility because my body wasn't progressing and because our baby looked pretty big. I went home feeling a little discouraged that my body wasn't progressing and a bit afraid of a c-section but I honestly didn't think I'd end up having one because I was hopeful I'd go into labor.
I met with my actual doctor, Dr. Brigger, two days later to be able to discuss the possible c-section to help prepare myself and also to check for any more progression. My mom and I went to the appointment that day (Taylor had work) hopeful for progression since she had to leave in just two days! Dr. Brigger checked me, and I could just tell by her face that my body hadn't progressed any more. She told me I was still at a 1 and not effaced at all. In general my doctor's practice doesn't induce women until 7 days past their due date unless there is a medical need because induction can increase your risk for c-section and other complications, so they like to give you as much time possible to go into labor yourself. I'd had an induction scheduled for Tuesday, July 21st just in case I didn't deliver before then but honestly even when they called the week before to confirm it I didn't think I'd end up making it to that point because I was SURE (OK, not really sure, just hopeful) that Hazel was going to come before then. However, Dr. Brigger talked to me about the induction in case that happened. She talked to me about the c-section possibility and told me it was about 50/50 that I may need one given that I was past my due date and was still at a 1 and no other signs of progression and because our baby was looking pretty big so she may not end up being able to safely be pushed out of me without getting stuck. I really appreciated the respect Dr. Brigger gave me in making sure that everything that happened was my choice but also that I knew her medical opinion and why she felt that way to help me have a good understanding of everything. She told me that if I really wanted to, I could just schedule a c-section at that point since I had a good chance of needing one, but that it was her gut feeling that we should at least let me try to go into labor, which I really appreciated because it made me feel encouraged that I could maybe do it and that she didn't just want to get my delivery over with. She never made me feel like she was just making the choice herself, and she made me feel like I had a chance still of delivering how I'd always planned and hoped for. I felt good about how she felt so we planned to go with the induction and see what happened.
Induction Day
My induction day--Tuesday, July 21st came. This was also the 8th anniversary of my dad's passing. I've been in Utah on this day for every year since his passing so normally we'd visit his grave at the cemetery in Provo. Other than that we all kind of deal with the day on our own in our own way. I felt happy knowing that this day that was normally a sad day when a special spirit left the earth was possibly going to change to a happy day when a new special spirit joined the earth.
The hospital told me they'd call between 5 and 6pm to tell me what time to come in that night. 6pm came and they hadn't called! I should add that they gave me instructions to start a fast of no food and only water and gatorade to drink starting at noon that day. They told me that if I got really hungry I could have some {wait for it} CHICKEN BROTH. Haha, really?! Honestly I think Heavenly Father really blessed me because at that point in pregnancy I was ALWAYS hungry, but that day it wasn't as bad fasting as I thought it would be, but I was still struggling not eating. So anyway, I was super hungry and grumpy that they hadn't called. They told me to call at 6 if I hadn't heard from them. I waited until 6:01pm to call them so I didn't seem super crazy for calling RIGHT at 6:00pm haha.
When I called they told me that all the rooms were full and that I'd need to call back at 7:30pm to check for an update. I was SO frustrated. I felt like my baby was NEVER going to come and that I was going to be pregnant forever! That sounds ridiculous but that's honestly how I felt. There were 4 babies in our ward due within 2 weeks, and two of them had already been born (one of those was due after my baby) and the 4th was due that day, and I was sure she'd come before my baby at that point. I was also just so hungry and not knowing when I'd go into labor meant not knowing when I'd ever get to eat! My mom and Taylor were nice and did everything they could to help me feel better while I waited since all I could do was just cry and wait at that point. We started watching The Proposal and I made some Ramen Noodles for the chicken broth and "accidentally" swallowed a good amount of noodles, too. Oops (don't worry--my doctor told me (but "didn't tell me---if you know what I mean) it was OK). At 7:00PM I got a call from the hospital (I didn't even have to call them!) and they told me I could come at 7:30 to be admitted! My nerves started to set in and we started gathering all our things! I asked Taylor for a priesthood blessing, and he gave me a beautiful blessing that helped me feel calm and at peace before going in to the hospital. I know this sounds completely ridiculous, but I had this crazy fear of dying during child birth or having some crazy complications since you always hear random stories like that. But I told myself that the only way to get our baby here was to be brave and endure any and all pain and to do whatever they needed to do to get her here. I honestly struggle with the pain of going to the dentist (remember that one time I had to get 12 cavities filled while pregnant and couldn't have all the pain meds??), so the potential pain of giving birth really scared me. I know there is a whole movement nowadays where women go around saying how giving birth should be empowering and how it shouldn't involve fear, making those of us who are afraid feel kind of weak. But I'm just being honest, I was scared! But luckily I know Heavenly Father helped me through it with the great help of my amazing doctor and labor & delivery nurse and my sweet husband.
Pulling up to the hospital-- Our last picture as a family of 2!
When we got to the hospital we got all checked in and settled. The nurse was nice but didn't seem super on top of things which made me feel uneasy. When she gave me my IV, blood spurt all over (Taylor told me later that it was like on the floor and all over my hand--I wasn't looking) and even after she cleaned it up I had dried blood in several places on my hand which just kind of made it look like a sloppy job :(. I was a bit uneasy about having her be my nurse that night but luckily nurses changed shifts by the time I gave birth :). She gave me the cervidil to soften my cervix which we knew could maybe help me go into labor that night but I wasn't too optimistic given my lack of progression the previous few weeks. I opted out of taking the sleeping pill they offered me in case I did go into labor because I didn't want to be all drugged and drowsy during labor if it happened. Looking back I should've just taken it because it was a restless sleep!
I had packed a couple pictures of my dad in my hospital bag since this was a day I wish he could've been here for. Little did I know I'd end up going in to be induced on a day that is close to my heart because of him as well.
Labor
The next morning nurses changed (thank goodness. I mean bless the girl's heart but she just seemed like maybe she needed more sleep) and we met Lexi, the sweetest and best nurse I've ever met! She was so kind and thorough with everything she did. I was so grateful she was our nurse through the day. She was on top of everything and was personable and since she had to be in my room pretty much the whole day she kind watched the movies we were watching with us while we waited and it wasn't like having this random stranger just sitting with us all day--it was more like a friend. After Lexi came in she had to draw a bunch of blood for lab work because the nurse the night before had done that but never sent the blood in or requested the lab work so they had to do it all over. Serious struggles :/. I apparently also wasn't given all the paperwork to sign I was supposed to be given the night before (another yikes) so we luckily got that taken care of too. Dr. Brigger later came in to break my water and gave me pitocin to get contractions going. I was really nervous about everything still, but Taylor was so good and just held my hand through it all and kept telling me I was doing a good job at everything.
I started having contractions which was exciting because honestly I didn't really have any contractions at home besides some mild Braxton Hicks. Lexi told me I could get the epidural whenever I wanted. As mentioned, I was really nervous about the pain of giving birth. However, I was just as scared of getting the epidural which would help with the pain! Luckily pregnancy made me a little less scared of needles since I had blood work done often. Lexi was awesome and explained what exactly getting one is like and when I asked her when most people get it she explained (in a professional way) what most of her patients do and the pros and cons of that timing. I told her I could wait it out for a bit at that point. She had to run and do a couple things so I figured I'd maybe get one when she got back if the pain increased. Of course right after she left I started having some very painful contractions so I called her and asked for the epidural right away. She was quick in getting everything ready and the anesthesiologist there right away. Dr. Santiago was the anesthesiologist and he was amazing too. He came in and he and Lexi helped get the epidural going and they did a great job making it a quick and fairly comfortable experience. Epidurals are amazing, people!
A couple hours went by and I chilled watching movies and apparently having really strong contractions but I couldn't feel them too badly. Lexi checked me and I was at a 4. I was having a hard time at this point since it had been about 24 hours since I'd eaten food (besides the few noodles I "accidentally" ingested). I had eaten a few popsicles (the awesome 5 calorie ones...not the super yummy grocery store eat-on-a-hot-summer-day kind). I was feeling nauseous and ended up (sorry TMI) throwing up a couple times so then I was told I couldn't have the popsicles either anymore, so at that point I was only allowed the ice chips. I was sure hoping that I'd go into labor in the not too distant future because I was not feeling well!
A couple hours later she checked me again and said I was at a 9! We were all really surprised at the rate of progress, but I was excited that I would probably be having my baby the good old fashioned way! Taylor and I started letting our family and close friends know of my progression since our girl was heavily anticipated by everyone since she was a week late. Lexi called my doctor who was in a surgery but would come soon. When Dr. Brigger came she was thrilled with my supposed progress and ready to bring our baby into the world! This was at about 1pm. She checked my dilation and this is when everything changed.
"She's at at 4...", she said. I was sure she was kidding. Like, I legitimately thought she was trying to be funny. A FOUR?! What happened to a 9?? I know what you're thinking--I thought Lexi was an awesome, thorough nurse? How was she so wrong?? . Good question. But apparently (I honestly don't remember the details of the explanation) sometimes the cervix can be tricky and what happened wasn't common but the doctor wasn't upset or overly-shocked at the incorrect dilation assessment done by Lexi. Dr. Brigger said she'd give me a few more hours then come back and check. Lexi felt really bad and honestly if she hadn't been such an awesome nurse I would've been frustrated but I could tell (since I was there for the whole thing) it was an honest mistake. We texted all our family and friends back and told them of the false alarm. I felt a little frustrated with my body and felt like I wasn't doing what I was supposed to be able to do--recognize that my body should be having a baby and prepare for it. It's interesting because I felt like my body had been able to get pregnant and have a healthy pregnancy but now it was unable to complete the task which made me feel sad but grateful for technology and that there was a back-up plan in this situation.
Dr. Brigger came back at about 3:30 to check my progress. I was still at a 4. She told me that at this point she felt that maybe we should just do a c-section. She said I could try to continue to labor if I wanted to and we'd hope for everything to go well and for me to be able to push little Hazel out, but that a c-section was what she thought we should do at that point. She didn't want to put me through hours and hours of labor and pushing at that point, especially since a c-section was very likely at the end of the day anyway because of the rate of my progression and the fact that I was already at 7 days past my due date. I asked Dr. Brigger if that was what she really felt was best and she said it was. Dr. Brigger was such a great doctor throughout my pregnancy and I always knew she had my best interest in mind. There was a time when we had some possibly worrisome things show up on Hazel's ultrasounds and it was a scary time for us, and especially for me (in case you can't tell, I'm a professional worrier). She helped us through that time helping us understand different options to find out more information through testing, and she was always very sensitive to how I was feeling and respectful of the decisions we made. Everything ended up clearing up on the ultrasound and nothing came of what they had seen, but that experience helped me to have confidence in her opinion. I was nervous about having a c-section, but at that time I just had a feeling and knew that that was the best option for us to have a safe and healthy delivery for both me and our baby. I called my mom to tell her so she and my brother could come soon, and before I knew it they were wheeling me off to the OR and Taylor was given scrubs to change into and a locker to put all our stuff in.
Delivery
They took me into the OR and I was given more anesthesia while they got me onto the table (I felt so bad for those people who had to lift me on the table. I felt HUGE at that point). They all suited up for the surgery, had me take off my wedding ring (it stayed on the whole pregnancy--wahoo!) and earrings and went and found Taylor for him to keep them safe. Later Taylor was able to come in and stayed by my side the whole time. One thing I had always wanted to have was a photographer to be there when I gave birth to be able to capture things that I may not remember during that crazy time. I'd had had our friend Ashley scheduled to be our birth photographer tentatively if Hazel came on or before July 10th because Ashley was going to be out of town after that, but we all know little Hazel came well after that so that didn't work out. I didn't feel comfortable hiring some random person I didn't know to come be in the delivery room with us and since we are new to Houston I didn't really know any other photographers except my friend Sarah who gave birth on my due date (also a week after her due date) so that wasn't going to happen either. We decided to just take pictures ourselves which worked out since I don't even know if they would have let a photographer in the operating room since many hospitals don't allow more than just your spouse or one person with you. Taylor was so cute and did an awesome job photographing all the things he thought I'd want to be able to have to look back on later. He normally hates taking pictures but he kept our camera close to him that whole day, and has since used his phone and our camera way more than I ever thought I'd ever see! Funny what little girls can do to dads :).
Taylor's cute selfie I found on the camera that he took after getting into all his gear :)
The surgery went well, and there were no complications. Everything happened so fast. Dr. Brigger had come in to check me at 3:30 which is about when we decided on the c-section and little Hazel was born at 4:08pm.
Dr. Brigger was good at talking me through the surgery as things were leading up to Hazel being delivered. Right before she was ready to pull Hazel out, she said something you hear at the dentist a lot (can you tell I've had a lot of dental experience??): "OK you're going to feel a lot of pressure" and then before I knew it I heard our little Hazel crying. She was finally here! I'd waited 9 months to finally meet this little girl and the time was finally there! I felt so happy for the delivery to be over since I'd been so nervous about it, and now I got to just enjoy our sweet girl. They held little Hazel up over the drape they had between me and the surgery they had done so I could see her. She had her little fists clenched tight and had some good loud cries. She was beautiful. I think I was in shock and in awe realizing that she was ours, for us to take home and to take care of. It's funny because you spend 9 months having this little baby grow inside of you and you spend all that time imagining he or she will be like, and then in an instant all the sudden they're there!
It was such an amazing moment when Hazel came in to our world. My favorite moment was probably looking over at Taylor who had stood up to watch them and get some pictures as they delivered Hazel and seeing his face as he saw Hazel for the first time. It's something I wish I had a picture of, but I will never forget his face.
The brought little Hazel over for me to hold her and have some skin-to-skin time. I held her for a few minutes and just enjoyed my time with her. I couldn't believe she was my baby. I think I was just in shock and it really didn't hit me that she was really mine (well not really mine--but a gift from Heavenly Father) until later that night. I held her and just felt so, so grateful. That's honestly the only word I can use to describe how I felt. I was so grateful for her and for the fact that she had made it to us safely and that I was healthy and safe as well. This moment went by so quickly because of how I was feeling physically, but I'm grateful for it no matter how fast it went.
Hazel came in weighing 9 pounds, 2 ounces, which is exactly what they had estimated her to be exactly a week prior, so that ultrasound at the time was measuring a little high for that exact day, but it was pretty accurate! She was also 21 inches long, so she definitely wasn't a small baby by any means.
Taylor and Hazel were taken to a recovery room while I got stitched up. Later I was able to join them and we had some time just the three of us while we waited to be taken to a postpartum room. We ended up waiting about 3 hours instead of the 45 minutes they told us we'd be waiting, but it was nice to have that time together before getting settle in the room we'd end up staying in for the next 3 days!
Once we were in a postpartum room my mom and Chris were finally able to come in and meet Hazel. I was so grateful they were able to stay long enough to be able to meet her before needing to head home early the next morning. It meant so much to have some family there. It's hard living so far from home and away from all both of our families, so it was nice having some familiar faces there for such a big part of our lives. It's funny because having a baby and becoming a mom has really just made me want my mom all the time! Moms are just so comforting to have during times like this.
Behind The Name
Hazel's full name is Hazel Erica Kailani Hibbs. A few people have asked about her name so I thought I'd explain! First of all, naming a baby was way harder than I thought it would be! Hazel didn't have her name fully picked until the morning after she was born. Like I said, I was pretty out of it when she was born, so I did not want to be making major life decisions such as giving someone a name when I wasn't feeling quite like myself. We always knew we would probably wait until we met our baby to say 100% what her name was, but we figured we'd have a couple solid names (first and middle) ready and that when we met her we would pick one. This was kind of the case with first names as we had a couple that we liked but felt pretty set on Hazel if it matched her. Hazel was my great-grandma Jones' first name and I've always thought it was pretty.
As far as middle names, I always planned to give my girls a middle name (I know lots of people don't give girls middle names so they can just use their maiden when they get married). Taylor's family all have two middle names: one English and one Hawaiian. This isn't something everyone in Hawaii does or anything, nor was it something his family expected us to do or would be bugged if we didn't. But because it was a family tradition we had kept it open as an option if we had both and English and Hawaiian name we liked.
We were pretty sure we wanted to use Kailani as her middle name or one of two middle names if we used two. We had talked to a few family members and friends who knew a lot about the Hawaiian language so that we could find a name that we knew the correct meaning of and so we could get some advice on things to consider when picking a Hawaiian name. I wanted a name that was easy to pronounce since it would be embarrassing if I couldn't pronounce my own child's name, and also since my side of the family isn't as familiar with how to pronounce Hawaiian names. I also didn't want a super long name especially if she might have two middle names. And, of course, I wanted the meaning of the name to suit our little girl. Kailani means 'heavenly sea' which we liked for a few reasons.
My dad's name is Eric, and ever since he passed I knew I'd want to use his name in some way when I had kids. I had always planned to use it for one of my sons. Very early on in pregnancy I had thought about maybe using Erica, but later we decided to save it to use for one of our sons. However, when I ended up going in to be induced on the day my dad passed, we thought we may name her Erica if she was born that day in honor of my dad. When she wasn't born on the 21st we decided we still wanted to use Hazel, but since we had considered using it for her first name we thought it would be nice to use still as one of her middle names.
So there ya go! This is our sweet girl Hazel! I am so grateful for her and for the blessing she has already been in our family. Being a parent has been a learning experience! We don't sleep much and we don't really know what we are doing, but we are learning to work together as a family of 3 to figure it all out! I've absolutely loved watching Taylor become a dad. It's seriously been amazing to watch him love and help take care of our girl.
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