I know Thanksgiving is over (I still have one of those "I'm thankful for..." posts I'm working on, because I didn't want to post something every day on FB up until Thanksgiving (not hating on you if you did that :) ). However, recently (meaning like, right now) I've just had small reminders, or tender mercies, about being grateful for what I have now.
In church on Sunday the talks were on gratitude. They both came down to being about being grateful for what we have NOW because it's always possible to find something we 'need', that we don't already have, to be happy...but there's no use in that because we have a lot right in front of us now.
So I'm sitting there in Sacrament meeting thinking about how great my life really is right now, even though sometimes I find many faults with it. One thing in particular I was thinking about that I'm grateful for is my health--particularly for the strength and the non-existence of pain in my back. I've mentioned previously, but this past April I experienced severe muscle spasms in my lower back. It sounds like some crazy out-of-control thing..but that's cause it is. Basically I couldn't walk, sit up, roll to my side, or (sorry if this is TMI) go to the bathroom by myself. I couldn't even stand to shower by myself.
It has taken about 5 months to fully recover (I know that might not sound long to someone who has had worse ailments...but for me as I've been active my whole life, this was very difficult because I couldn't do ANY physical activity). So on Sunday I was thinking about how horrible those days were. I told myself that from that day on I was going to take advantage of my good health and all my other blessings, and make the most of them and enjoy them. That was just yesterday.
Yesterday I woke up with some small pains in my back. Throughout the day it progressively got worse. I went to see the dance trainer at BYU, and that helped a little, but not too much. They told me there that I just have a really unique case of muscle problems and that I'll just have to work my way through it. I had a whole list of things I wanted to get done yesterday and today, taking for granted that I could just do them no problem--something I couldn't have done seven months ago. However, the possible beginning of these back troubles has returned, so I've been faced with the question of whether I'm still willing to make the most of the blessings I have in my life, even if maybe one of my 'blessings' isn't as good as it was yesterday.
Right after reading scriptures and praying with Taylor, I came back to my computer to work on my lesson plan for my dance teaching final tomorrow (something I'm not sure right now how I'm going to get through with my back pains), and Facebook was open (don't lie, yours probably always is too :) and my friend's (who is on a mission right now) sister had just updated my friend's status. It was a long story about a woman serving in my friend's mission who has been having severe health issues. At the very end it said something that reminded me to be grateful:
"Live your lives this week for a miracle". The phrase from my friend's mission president was a request to all the missionaries to live in a way that would help heal the sister on the mission. However, this quote had special meaning for me because it reminded me that I have power in the way I handle my trials (and my blessings) in life. I can live to keep my trial a burden, or I can live in hopes for a miracle. My choice is to live for a miracle :)